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Date: Sat, 12 Jun 2004 23:57:46 -0400
Subject: [ASC] NEW: TOS Scientist [PG13] 3/3  K/Ch, ChFF
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Forwarded by the ASC-VSO 
Posted: 11 Jun 2004 21:02:48 -0700  
In: alt.startrek.creative 
From: djinn@djinnslair.com (Djinn) 
 

TITLE: Scientist
AUTHOR: Djinn
CONTACT: djinn@djinnslair.com http://www.djinnslair.com
SERIES: TOS
RATING: PG-13
CODES: K/Ch, Chapel Fic Fest
PART: 3/3
DISCLAIMERS: Paramount and Viacom own these characters--I'm just
warping canon.
SUMMARY: Sequel to "Doctor." The continuing look at Chapel through



Weeks begin to run together.  There are the latest crises and coming
up with ways to deal with them.  There are the parties when they
handle a biggie, and donuts for the small victories.  She'd be gaining
weight from all the food if she wasn't so busy running things down
when she's not on the headsets.  There are very few parts of Starfleet
Command or Medical she doesn't end up in for meetings, very few
admirals she hasn't briefed at this point.

It's heady.  It's exhausting.  It's a rush.

Matthew stops by often.  They go to lunch on Wednesdays when he's in
the building for his briefings to personnel on the latest cadet
achievements and infractions.  And increasingly they go to lunch on
other days.  She's not sure she would survive without him.

Or without Janice.  Her friend is the only one she can talk about Jim
to.  She doesn't go into specifics, doesn't want to hurt Janice that
way.  But it feels good to know that when the ache for Jim gets too
bad, she has someone who understands.  Someone who loved him too.

It's selfish and she's asked Janice if it would be easier not to talk
about Jim.  Janice just laughs at her.  Give her one of her "ops"
looks and tells her to shut up.  Friends listen.  Friends are there.

Her comm unit buzzes as another message drops into her queue.  It's
from Matthew.  It says, "I have a social emergency.  I know that is
not your field, but perhaps you could branch out?  Retirement ceremony
tonight for an old friend.  My date has the flu.  Go with me?  (I
assume you have a dress uniform?)"

She laughs.  Comms him back.  "Social emergencies require serious
compensation in the form of expensive booze."

Another message drops in her queue.  "Agreed.  Name your poison.  Oh,
and I'll pick you up at 1900."

She laughs and goes back to her emergencies.  The day is uneventful,
which for them means the Federation is not in immediate danger of
collapse.  She leaves the Beta Shift science officer with a laundry
list of crises to watch.  He just smiles at her.  None of them would
know what to do if things got slow.

Matthew is prompt, whistles appreciatively at her as she models her
dress uniform.   Reed made her get it when she first started,
authorized it on her uniform allowance.  Her old dress uniform is
apparently woefully out of date.

He has a flitter waiting and she climbs in.  They talk during the
short ride to the club, and he hands her out with a gallant bow.

She laughs.  Realizes she is enjoying herself with him.  He takes her
arm, an easy movement with no territoriality in it.  He's glad to be
with her.  He enjoys her.   Smiling, she tries to show how much she
likes him too.  And how grateful she is to him.

She meets more admirals, but most of the brass at the ceremony already
know her from ops, maybe not by name, but enough to nod and murmur,
"Commander," with recognition in their eyes as they do it.  It's a
nice feeling.

The ceremony is moving, the honoree a woman who made a difference
wherever she served.  When Matthew gives his tribute, Christine
smiles.  He is such a good man.

They wander to a bar set up outside on a patio, and enjoy the warm
night air.

"You wanted expensive, right?"

She nods.  Is about to order single malt and thinks better of it. 
"Champagne.  The good stuff."

He makes a face.  "Tiny bubbles are for the birds."

She laughs.  "You don't like champagne?"

"No."  He smiles.  "But I'll get you some."

She wanders to the end of the patio, looking out on the city and the
sparkling lights.

He comes out with something clear and full of ice for himself, and
hands her a champagne flute.  "Dom Perignon all right with you?"

She laughs. "Oh, yes."  She sips at it and smiles as the bubbles dance
over her tongue.  "Good stuff."

"So is this.  Good Russian vodka."  He holds up his glass, touches it
against hers.  "To endings.  And new beginnings."  His expression is
very warm.  Very gentle.

She thinks she should be nervous.  But being with him is low pressure.
 He may be saying he's interested in her, but if he is, it's in a
subtle way.  She'll worry about subtext when it becomes text.

"I have a confession to make."

She waits.

"My date didn't have the flu.  Actually, I didn't have a date."

She laughs.  "You planned this?"

He nods.  

"I wish we could plan all our emergencies like that."

He seems to relax.  She is about to say something else when a familiar
voice calling out a greeting makes her turn.  She hears a laugh she'd
know anywhere, turns to see Jim and Antonia near the bar. She can feel
her face freeze.

Matthew turns to see what she is looking at.  He lets out a ragged
breath.  "I didn't know he'd be here.  I swear I wouldn't have asked
you if I had.  I wouldn't do that to you."

Jim's hand is low on Antonia's rather over-exposed back.  She is
cuddling in close to him.  Christine wants to go over and throw her
drink at one or both of them.  She also wants to sink into the floor
and disappear. She does neither.

Calling on willpower she isn't sure she has, she turns back to
Matthew.  "It's okay. I'm okay."

He moves closer to her, as if hiding her from Jim.  She pushes him
away.  "Let him see me.  It's his loss, right?"

He nods.

The drinks have clearly gone to both their heads.  Jim is with a
beautiful woman in a gorgeous dress.  The most that Christine can say
for herself is that she's attractive in her dress uniform.

"It is his loss, Christine.  If I were Jim, I'd have stayed and worked
it out."

She smiles at him, supposes that is true.  But then Matthew probably
can't understand the anger that Jim felt, that she still feels both at
herself and at Jim.  Matthew seems to lack fire.  His one true passion
appears to be for the Klingons he hates so much.

She turns, sees Jim looking their way.  He is scanning the crowd, but
he freezes as he sees her.  Their eyes seem to lock, even if that's
impossible with the distance between them.  For a moment she forgets
to breathe.

Then he is pushing Antonia inside gently.  She imagines they will find
a reason to go.  Her date outranks him after all.  She gets to stay.

She'd rather leave with Jim.

She'd rather do a lot of things.  None of them are going to happen.

---------------------------

Her chime rings and Christine gets up from her couch reluctantly. 
It's been a long time since she's had a day off and she would rather
spend it alone, in the quiet that can never be found in ops.

She opens her door, sees Spock standing there.  "Hello."

"Hello, Christine."  He holds up the traveling Ka'Vareth board that
kept them so entertained on the Enterprise.  "I thought you might
enjoy a game?"

"And you just happened to know that I'd be off work?"  When he does
not answer, she asks, "Why are you off work?"

"The Academy is on break."  He sets up the game on the coffee table.

She makes them both tea then joins him.  "Long time."

"Yes.  I waited for you to come see me.  I did not want to press you. 
Not when I knew you would be hurting."

She nods.  She thought about going to him.  But in the end couldn't
bring herself to do it.  "You were Jim's friend first."

"That is true.  But I am your friend as well now."

"I betrayed him."

"Yes, he indicated it had something to do with his son, I believe." 
Spock does not look like he is judging her.

Why isn't he judging her?

"That's the short version, yeah."

"Unless you plan to tell me the long account, the short version is all
that I have."

"I'd rather not."

He nods, as if it does not matter much to him either way.  He makes
his first move.  "I have missed you, Christine.  And our games."

She has not played the game for months.  Fortunately, it is not
something you forget.  Not once it is in your blood.  She moves a
frontpiece in a daring opening.

"Interesting."  He looks up at her.  "You would not have made that
move before."

She frowns.  "Yes, I would have."

"You have never made that move before."  He moves to counter her
boldness.

She supposes if anyone can keep track of that kind of thing it is him.
 She makes another move, even more daring.

He almost frowns, appears to be trying to deduce if she has a strategy
or is just winging it.  "I think Emergency Operations is changing
you."

"In a good way?"

He looks at the board.  "That is not certain."

She laughs.

"Have you seen Jim?" he asks.

Her smile fades.  "No."  The word is full of meaning and finality. It
says, "Don't ask me about this, Spock.  Leave it alone."

Spock does not appear to hear it.  "I have seen him.  He does not
appear to be thriving in retirement."

She feels irrationally happy at the thought.  "No?"  This time the
word begs for more details.

"Matthew has asked me to watch out for Jim."  He raises an eyebrow, as
if asking her to figure out what that means.

"Ah.  For 'Operation: Bring Jim Back Into the Fold'?"

"Yes."  He waits for her reaction.

"Sneaky."

"I prefer the word strategic."

"Whatever."  She smiles at him.  "So you think he's ready to come
back?"

"Not yet."  He moves a piece in a rather daring move himself.  "But
soon."

"I see."  She studies the board, tries to figure out what the hell he
is doing.  If they are both playing a "seat of the pants" strategy,
the game will be pure chaos.  "And just how are you going to entice
him back once he's ready?"

"I will not.  You will."

She sets the piece she was moving back down.  "What?"

"Admiral Cartwright believes Jim still loves you.  I believe that as
well."

"You didn't see him when he was leaving."

"He did come to me, Christine."

She looks down.

"I know exactly how hurt he was.  I know exactly how you hurt him."

"Exactly?"  She is suddenly worried.  Did Jim meld with him?  Does
Spock really know everything?  What happened to the short version?

"We did not meld."  He takes a sip of tea.  "Are you going to play
eventually?"

"Oh."  She sets the piece down, not paying any attention.  

He doesn't seem to realize that.  Studies the move as if she has
invented a new strategy.

She waves her hand in front of his eyes.  "Spock, forget the damn
game.  What do you mean I'm going to bring him back?"
	
"Just what I said.  He is growing restive.  The last time I visited
him, he spent much time on the front steps, staring up at the stars. 
I am not sure he was even aware that he was doing it."

"Okay, so he's bored."  She hopes that he's bored with Miss Perfect
too.

"And I believe he misses you."

"You do?"  She laughs.  "Have you actually seen Antonia, Spock?"

"Oh, yes. She is stunningly beautiful."  He says it as if he is
appraising an old painting.

"And have you looked at me lately?"

He almost smiles.  "No, because you have been avoiding me."

"You know what I mean."  She sips her tea.  "I'm not in her league.  I
don't even own a dress like that."

He frowns, apparently Matthew didn't fill him in on Antonia's fashion
sense.

"Long story.  But I think Jim's got the package deal here, Spock."

"She lacks your fire.  She lacks your intelligence."

"She's dumb?"  Christine knows she is too eager to hear that, but
can't help herself.

"Jim would not stay with a woman who was of lower intelligence.  But
she is not like you."

"Maybe that's exactly why he loves her.  Because she's nothing like
me?"  She leans back.

"There is a chemistry between two people who are well matched and care
deeply for each other.  An energy, if you will.  You and Jim have it. 
Jim and Antonia do not.  If you are the one who offers him his life
back, I do not believe he will be able to turn it down."

She laughs.  "Who knew you were such the scheming diplomat."  In ops
being called a diplomat is not necessarily a compliment.

"Admiral Cartwright will tell you when it is time to begin
Operation--what did you call it?"

"'Operation Bamboozle Jim'?"

"I think that was not it.  But it is close enough."  He goes back to
studying the game.

She knows her game is ruined.  All she can think about is Jim.

-----------------------------------

She and Spock meet regularly for a game.  It has become habit, just as
eating lunch and the occasional dinner with Matthew has become a
habit.  Just as flying on pure adrenaline day in and day out has
become a habit.

She can throw a briefing together in five minutes.  She can work up
scenarios with the best of them.  Reed has begun to leave her in
charge.  At first she felt funny--she was one of the newest members of
the team--but no one seemed to mind.

"You're a leader, Christine.  Get over it."  Janice smiles at her over
drinks after work.

"But you've been there longer."

"Only by a few weeks.  And I have no desire to be Reed's exec. 
Believe me."  She frowns at Christine.  "Don't you get that they're
grooming you to take her job?"

"Who is?"

"Cartwright and Kachowa."

"You're making that up."

"I'm not."  Janice grins at her.  "Friends in high places."

Christine walks home thinking about the possibility of taking Reed's
job and realizes she wants it, wants it badly.  She's ready to move
beyond medical.  She reads the other sections' reports routinely.  She
loves to watch how all the pieces fit.

Matthew is waiting for her in the lobby when she walks in.  

"Hi," she says.

"Hi.  Can I come up?"

"Sure."  They ride in silence up to her floor, walk in silence down
the hall.  Once inside, she goes to the bar.  "Vodka?"  She keeps the
bar stocked.  Jim taught her the value of being a good host.

"No.  It's time, Christine.  It's time to bring him back."  

She walks over to him.  "I may not be the right person."

"No.  You're the right person."  He surprises her by reaching out,
stroking her cheek.  "I have to tell you, I'm a bit torn over this. 
He comes back and you'll be out of reach.  But then you're already out
of reach.  It's why I haven't pushed.  You don't seem ready--I'm not
sure you ever will be.  Jim's got a hold of your heart and he's never
letting go."

She looks down.  "I think you're right.  I do care about you but--"

He puts a finger over her lips.  "It's all right.  I want a woman who
loves me for me, not because I'm a nice guy."  He smiles sadly.  Then
perks up.  "And it's better that we're just good friends because I'm
going to be your boss.  Kachowa's job is mine effective two weeks from
now."

"Congratulations, Matthew."

"It's a big vote of confidence. But I know we won't let them down." 
He grins at her.  "I want Jim to take my billet at the Academy.  It's
a lot more interesting than just teaching.  He'll be shaping
curriculum, out in space with the cadets on the test cruises,
administering the Kobayashi Maru."  He grins at that.

"I'll use that in my sales pitch."

"You do that.  Oh and Reed will be rotating out soon too.  I'll be
assigning you to that job."

So Janice was right.

"Are you sure you don't want to wait and see if I can deliver Jim?" 
She grins.  Bringing Jim back may be impossible--her own no-win
scenario.  She knows Matthew won't hold it against her if she fails.

"He loves you, Christine.  I know it.  Hell, even Spock knows it." 
When she doesn't comment, he says, "Jim told Spock that he and Antonia
would be visiting his uncle's place in Idaho.  They'll be there a few
days before heading back home.  Go there.  It's neutral ground."

She looks down.  "Not exactly.  He met Antonia there, remember?"

"Even better.  Guilty ground."  

She's told him the story.  Didn't mean to but it came out one night
after too much expensive champagne.

"You go tomorrow morning, Commander.  Failure is not an option."

She can't help it.  She laughs.  But she stands at attention, and her
unwavering gaze forward is regulation perfect.  "Sir, yes, sir."

He moves closer.  "I'm only going to do this once.  Then we forget I
ever tried, okay?"

She nods, lifts her face to his so he can kiss her.

It's a nice kiss.  Friendly.  Warm.

It doesn't move her at all.

He seems to know that as he pulls away.  "The man ruined you for
anyone else, Christine.  I'm not sure if you are lucky or cursed."

She laughs softly.  "I'm not sure either, Matthew."

He smiles at her.  "Good luck, Commander."  Then he is gone. 

She can barely sleep.  Is up with the sun and has to wait a while
before beaming over.  This time she beams to the closest town and
rents a flitter to take her to Harry's place.  She flies over, gets
out and walks to the main house.

She knocks and waits, but no one comes.  Backing up, she studies the
house and sees that a curtain upstairs is swinging slightly as if
someone was watching her but then ducked out of sight.  She turns and
listens for a moment, then heads for the stables.

"Harry?"

Jim's uncle looks up from where he is mucking out a stall. 
"Christine?"

She nods, unsure what her reception will be.

"Good god, girl.  Come here."  He drops the rake, strides over to her,
and grabs her up in a hug.  "How the hell are you?"

She laughs.  "I'm good."

He lets her go.  "Really?"

"Well, I'd be better if I was staying here and not just visiting." 

He looks suddenly guilty.  

"It's okay."  She touches his arm.  "I know she's here."

He nods.  

"Harry, it's all right to like us both."  She kisses his stubbly cheek
and says, "It's good if Jim's happy."

She pulls back, studies Harry's face.  He doesn't look like he thinks
Jim is all that happy.  But he tries to cover it up by telling her how
much Jim likes riding.

"Is that where he is now?"

He nods.

"Can I borrow a horse?"  At his look, she holds up a hand.  "I'm not
here on my own behalf.  I'm on official Starfleet business.  Admiral
Cartwright sent me."

He looks uncertain, and a new, softer voice calls out from behind
them.  "It's okay, Harry.  I'll get her fixed up."

Christine turns.  If anything, Antonia is even more beautiful close
up.  Soft, perfect features.  Deep brown eyes.  Lustrous dark hair. 
And a lovely petite and very curvaceous figure.

She tries not to conjure up a picture of Andrea to compare her with. 
Tries not to feel gawky and overly tall and uncertain, but the vision
moves closer--Antonia is graceful even in a dust-filled barn.

"You're Christine, aren't you?"

She nods.

Antonia turns.  "Come on, the horses are out here."  She leads
Christine to a large corral where six horses are moving restlessly.  
She hooks her arms over the fence, whistles and a dark bay horse trots
up.  Her hand goes out, the horse nuzzles her gently.

"Yours," Christine says softly.

"If only everything were so easily claimed."  Antonia turns to her. 
"I've spent the last two years being jealous of you."

"Have you looked in the mirror?"  Christine smiles a bit bitterly. 
This is a strange conversation.

"Oh, I've made a living on my looks.  I have no illusions on that
front."  She touches the horse's forelock, moves it away from his eyes
and rubs between them.  "Beauty can attract, but it can't hold."  She
looks over at Christine, gives her an odd look.

"He's starting to sneak out at night, isn't he?  You've caught him
sitting on the front stoop staring up at the stars?"  She isn't afraid
to use what Spock told her.  Knows he gave it to her as ammunition.

He wants Jim back just as much as she does.  He'll never admit it, but
he may want him back for the same reasons.  Because he loves him. 
Because he misses him.

Antonia nods slowly.  "He seems...bored these days.  If he weren't,
I'd give you the meanest horse here and send you in the wrong
direction."  She sighs.  "Pick one."

Christine knows that Antonia's bay is not included in that choice. 
She looks out over the horses, chooses a scrubby buckskin that looks
like it could run all day.  "That one."

Antonia laughs softly.  "Of course, you'd choose the mustang.  She was
skittish, hard to gentle."  She looks down.  "The only one Jim told me
not to ride.  I think I finally understand why."  She climbs over the
fence in a quick motion, grabs a halter, and retrieves the horse. 
"Her name is Caya," she says as she leads her out of the gate and ties
her to the fence, saddling her quickly.

"I can do it."

"No. I'm the hostess."  She seems angry now, won't look anywhere but
at the horse as she works.

Christine thinks Antonia might be trying not to cry.  She also thinks
she will check the girth before she gets on.

"Couldn't you just turn around and go away?" Antonia says.  "Leave us
alone?"

"No.  We need him."

"And they send you?  The stars offered to him by you?  Starfleet
really doesn't fight fair, does it?"

"No."  She meets Antonia's eyes.  "I don't intend to fight fair
either."

"I know."  Antonia backs away.  She laughs slightly as Christine
tightens the girth before she swings up onto the horse.  "Did you
expect me to fight fair?"

"Frankly, I'd be disappointed if you did."

Antonia smiles, a real smile this time.  "I expected to hate you."

"Same here."  Christine smiles gently.  "But then this is James T.
Kirk we're fighting over.  He generally has great taste in women."

Antonia looks down.  "Tell me, are they enough?  The memories of
having loved him?"

Christine decides not to lie to her.  "No.  They're not."

Antonia sighs, then points down a dusty road.  "Follow that until you
come to the trees, then go straight on through.  Once you pass the
creek you'll see a ravine up ahead.  He's usually there.  Jumping it."
 She looks down.

From rock climbing to this new form of thrill seeking.  Jim isn't very
original when it comes to showing how dissatisfied he is.  But she
doesn't offer that opinion to Antonia, just nods and says, "I'll find
him."

"I have no doubt of that."  Antonia crawls back over the fence; her
bay comes close and she wraps her arms around his neck.

At least she can be sure of one of her men.

Christine takes off down the road, letting the mare settle into her
own pace.  Caya's gallop is rougher than the horses she used to ride
on her grandfather's farm, but the mare probably could run all day if
she had to.

The sun is hot, and Christine wishes she'd brought a hat.  She squints
against the brightness, then sighs in relief when she finally reaches
the trees.  Caya has slowed to a nice canter, taking it easy on both
of them.  As they pass a creek, Christine slows her even more.

She sees him up ahead.  He is on a dark bay horse, light-limbed and
tall, probably bred to jump things like the ravine Jim is making him
leap over and over.  She pulls up, waits for him to see her.

He urges his horse forward, the movement of his hands and feet and
seat nearly undetectable.  He rides horses the same way he used to
ride her.  With perfect control.

She feels a rush of lust at the sight of him, at being alone with him
finally after the time apart.  She loves how he fills out the riding
pants, how strong his arms look in the short sleeved shirt he is
wearing.  She barely looks at other men, but she can't keep her eyes
off Jim.

She wants him.  Will there ever come a day when she doesn't?

She sees his look change as he realizes it is her.  "Chris?"  For a
second, she thinks he would like to pull her off the horse and into
his arms, but then his expression becomes neutral.

And wary.

"Fancy meeting you here."  He turns, clucks to his horse and shifts
forward.  The horse takes off for the ravine again, leaps it
effortlessly.  Jim stops him, wheeling in a tight circle so he is
facing her.  He leans forward.  "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here on Matthew's behalf."

"Let me guess.  An offer from Starfleet?  Not interested."

"Why don't you let me tell you about it before you reject it?"

"Well, I would, Chris.  But see, you're over there and I'm here.  It's
a problem."

"Jump back over here."

"Don't want to."  He grins--meanly, she thinks.   "You show me yours,
I'll show you mine."

She remembers a time, long before they got together, when he was the
one pursuing her and she said those words to him.  What was it he
said?  She remembers.  "You think I won't?"

He shrugs, begins to turn away.

She leans down, pats Caya on the neck, under her coarse mane.  "Let's
show him what wild horses are made of, girl."  She urges her forward,
and Caya tears up the ground as the ravine gets closer and closer.

She cannot see Jim's face.  She wonders if he is worried, but forgets
everything in the rush she gets as the horse takes off, clearing the
ravine by several feet.  The horse slows, and Christine turns her in a
lazy circle, joining him at the edge of the ravine.

He is staring at her, and she sees that he was worried.  She doesn't
hesitate, knows this may be the only time he will be open to the
offer, to even listening to her.  "Matthew is moving up to be head of
Emergency and Relief Operations.  Starfleet needs someone in his
position at the Academy.  Someone like you."

"I'm retired."

"Yes, and quite busy, I see.  Are you climbing mountains too?  Or is
this the extent of your risk taking?"

His look turns stony.

"You're bored, Jim."  She turns Caya, trots her back, then sets her
against the ravine again.

The mare clears it effortlessly.  She turns.  "I've shown you mine..."

His mouth tightens and he turns his horse, getting the distance he
needs to make the jump.  The horse is beautiful when he runs, even
more beautiful as he leaps the gap.

When Jim rides back to her, she leans in.  "Tell me, love, how many
times has Antonia jumped the ravine?"

He looks away, and she laughs.  This is it; this is where she doesn't
play fair.  This is where she wins him back for Starfleet, for
Matthew, for Spock, and please god, someday for herself.

"She doesn't need to jump the ravine."  He is making his horse
sidestep up against hers, pushing Caya away from the edge.  She
wonders if he is even conscious he is doing it.

Her mare suddenly lunges at his horse, nipping him as he gets too
close.

Jim's laugh is unexpected.  "Even your horse is a bitch."

"She's not my horse, as you well know."

"Well, then, it figures you'd pick her."  He exhales loudly and
something seems to leave him.

She realizes it is his resistance to her offer.  She pushes her
advantage.  "This isn't for me, although I'd be lying if I said that I
don't miss you.  It's for you and for the Fleet.  We need you."  She
grins.  "And you'd be the one to administer the Kobayashi Maru.  Isn't
there some fine irony in that idea?"

He grins.  But as he looks at her, something fills his eyes.  It is
the old anger.

He hasn't forgiven her.

He may never forgive her.

She sighs.  "Our paths won't cross unless you want them to.  I'm in
the operations center or I'll be off world at some emergency or
other."  She looks down.  "Matthew will keep me out of your way, I
promise you."

"You and Matthew seem pretty close now."

"Jealous?"  She studies him.

He clamps down on something that does look very much like jealousy. 
"You're a free agent."

"Yes.  You made me one."  She looks down.  "But that's immaterial,
Jim.  I'm not the reason you should consider this.  Do you want back
up there?"  She points up.  "Because you can get there again."  She
plays her trump card.  "On the Enterprise."

He starts to look up at the sky, but then his gaze is arrested by
something else.  She follows his eyes, sees a horse and rider
silhouetted on the hillside.

She knows it is Antonia.  "She loves you," she says.

"And I love her."  His voice sounds broken.  

Christine leans in.  "I believe that.  But has it occurred to you that
she's your Joe?"  Their eyes meet and there is something lost in his. 
"Starfleet will need your answer by the end of the week."  She wheels
the buckskin and gallops off.

As she rides back to the barn, she realizes that Antonia is shadowing
her.  The other woman has not chosen to ride down, is not going to try
to convince Jim to stay with her.

Christine knows she's won.

Unless, of course, Antonia is armed.  She does not appear to be, or if
she is, decides not to shoot Christine on the short trip back to the
barn.  She rides up and dismounts as Christine is undoing the girth,
getting ready to pull the saddle from Caya's back.

"Leave it.  I'll do it."

Harry walks out.  "I'll take her."  He unties Caya, urges her to
follow him into the barn.  "It was nice seeing you, Christine."

Antonia stands between her and the flitter.  Her eyes are hard.  "He
loves me.  He'll choose me."

"Maybe."

"He doesn't love you anymore."   Pain is making Antonia harsh.

And a liar.  Christine saw love mixed with all the anger in Jim's
eyes.  But Antonia doesn't need to know that she knows that.  Not when
Antonia's going to lose him all on her own.  She's beautiful, she's
loving.  And Jim's bored with her.

Christine doesn't say that either.  "It doesn't matter whether he
loves me.  Does he still love space?  Does he still love the stars and
the ships and the life he left behind?"

Antonia looks down.

"I am sorry."  It's a lie, but Christine is getting better at them.
And this time it's for a good cause.  "I know what you'll be going
through."

She walks around the other woman, hurries to the flitter and climbs
in.  As she flies away, she sees Jim slowly riding up.  Antonia takes
one look at his face and turns on her heel, walking quickly into the
house.

He doesn't follow her.


FIN

--
Forwarded to ASCL by:
Stephen Ratliff
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